I woke up today filled with varied emotions centered around a conversation I had with my ex last night. She has been reading my blog, which I just recently learned, and is thoroughly unimpressed with my portrayal of her. It seems she has honed in on the negative aspects of what I write about instead of seeing the bigger picture. I admit that most of my conversations via this blog are negativity-laced, but that is why I started writing in the first place. Simply, to get the negative thoughts out and on paper so I can better understand and/or equip myself with tools necessary to combat the evil that is in my head. I told her that if she didn’t like what I was writing, she didn’t have to read it. We got into a huge fight about few things I’m not equipped to readily discuss right now, but feelings were hurt. I can’t understand how loving someone can be a negative thing and that is all I seem to feel when comes to her. This is a woman I wanted to marry and have children with, now in her mind, I am the Plague or something. I just don’t understand how we can keep going from bad to worse to WORSE. I do not seek out to say hurtful things as I have forgiven and seek forgiveness on both our parts. The Universe is cruel enough on its own without needing ammunition and I just hope she knows, deep down, my love is true and that will ALWAYS make me territorial and at times, overbearing. Karma is its own demon that will stop at nothing to wreck a life when you’re on the verge of happiness. I know this all too well. I just hope one day she takes heed, knowing that she is too good of a person to have so much disdain. Karma doesn’t descriminate, it just loves to feed on negativity.