Paranoia

Paranoia

rubbing this wall laced
with padding
sophisticated stitching designed
to keep them out

recurring dreams
of knives dripping blood
with no visible wounds
gun thrown
in the river out of fear
its barrel will never cool

the pills I pop throw
a lasso around thoughts
but its reigns always break

I hear freedom
is a state a mind
and home is where the heart is
cliche bits don’t provide
comfort to a soul tightly
sewn together by glaring
eyes and strong hands choking
me in my sleep

stuck in this drainage tube
memories are cloudy
positive rests
in a blender with the negative
while I’m forced to watch
its slow churn

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