For Kahlo and Piper

For Kahlo and Piper

strangers label me crazy 
eccentric in thinking  
that your furry exoskeletons 
have any notion of my existence 

bend the will of human parents 
chasing every avenue for a gesture 
lovingly 

hoping your brains can comprehend 
my lack of kisses on your noses 
and the thought worsens 
with every birthday and Christmas
un-celebrated 

what happens to our connection? 

I wish a passionate beating  
heart was enough
to join us 
reunite the familiarity 
of being my alarm clock  
kneading chest when it’s feeding time 
 
a last hope 
far fetched as an outcry 
I place belief 
in reincarnated spirits  
so what started will always remain 
a necessity for life 
love at it’s greatest

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I Don’t Want to Love Anymore

I Don’t Want to Love Anymore

deeper than the blade resting
in my rib cage
wetter than the blood-soaked
tissues I use to stop
its bleeding

tears falling
from lack of sleep
thoughts glued
to the image
of you smiling and dancing
around kitten eyes
watching perfection

forcing a dream of anonymity
but your picture is as clear
as the day you first kissed
away a pain too great
to keep me steady

for what was whole
now lay in pieces scattered
across a floor neither of us walk
on anymore

Mr. Dream

Mr. Dream

erase the feels of silk
long tresses
that flowed through fingertips
the anxiousness awaiting
our connection of lips
and starry-eyed visions
when we first met

hey mister mister
please don’t take
me back

to tears of every memory
good and bad
showing what I miss
out on everyday I keep
living this lie
teasing me with hallucinating
voices saying I love you
like she used to

hey mister mister
please don’t take
me back

to broken hearts, dreams,
and things I can’t fix
with plaster
building up my life again
a cracked soul
without tools to repair

hey mister mister
please don’t take
me back

to dreams
guiding me to nightmares
pretending she’s around
the next corner open arms
instead it’s an alleyway bashing
heads with a lead pipe
as I found my way
on the wrong side of her vengeance

hey mister mister
please don’t take
me back

to when the dust settled
and my life ripped in two
too stubborn to realize
her truth
only me and her
like it should’ve  been
when I was too afraid of change
too blind to see the ache
in eyes still trying 
to mimic sunrises

hey mister mister
please don’t take
me back

to being defeated
facing a reminder
I’m now only
a hollow shell

Searching

Searching

seeped out wells
too dry to find
tears waiting
for their place
to call home

instead I search
for a touch
long lost
in my indecisive anger

set my soul ablaze
in fear of letting go
so she just walked
away without a bread crumb
to follow
xeroxed copies
of a heart damaged
looking for its owner

in a snowstorm buried
deep is its key
the only way to release
me and my mistakes

open the safe and kiss me